Camping

We went camping this past weekend, to a place we had never been before. It was out past 5 mile, in the west desert, but there were trees all over..so not what I picture for the west desert. We had the privilege of staying in the motorhome with Jared's parents, which meant we had a bed to sleep in, air conditioning when it got hot, a dvd player to watch movies (the satellite signal never came in) and I got a hot shower on Saturday! IT was a fun trip. We took the four-wheelers and Polly's jeep, we took those out on Saturday for a nice ride. I started in the jeep with Polly but ended up on the bike behind Jared, which is why we only have one helmet! Jared's parents friends went with us, which made it fun! We had a nice campfire last night and stayed up late talking and roasting marshmallows. That is my idea of roughing it!

Jared came home yesterday and he brought me a present, a brand new lap-top. He thinks it is a good gift for me...and I totally agree! I have been talking (well thinking) about going back to school, now he isn't going to leave me alone until I actually do. I am scared, but I think it is something that will be helpful to me..now I just need to not be a chicken and actually do it!

Not really much to report on, it turns out I had to have surgery for the pregnancy, my Dr. gave me some pills to take that did nothing for me. The surgery was done on Wednesday. I stayed at Jared's parents during the day so I was not disturbed by people walking thorough our house. I am still in some pain but today I seem to be moving around a lot better, I guess 3 days and nights of sleeping probably helped! Jared has been great, getting me things and helping me do stuff. Surgery was not the road I wanted to go down but it had to be done, and now hopefully everything will heal up as it should.

We are having a fish fry today at Jared's parents house. His Dad Jerl caught a bunch of fish while they were on their trip to Oklahoma. Of course we will also have tri-tip and chicken for the non-fish lovers. Should be lots of good food and fun, something I need for sure!

Yep, our house is up for sale!
As much as we don't want to move, we need to. If anyone knows of rental houses out there (especially in the same neighborhood) please let us know! It will be hard to leave this house, and this great neighborhood where we have made so many friends, but it is something we have to do.

I have mixed feelings on whether I should share this or not...we thought we got great news about 7 weeks ago, okay wonderful news of being pregant! Long story short, there is no longer a pregnancy.
I went into the Dr. today to have a follow up ultra-sound after one 14 days ago, when everything seemed to be progressing fine. Now it isn't.
I just have so many mixed emotions about the whole thing. I makes me wonder why there are so many out there that can get pregant so easily or are un-wed parents who don't really want a baby, and they get pregant and everything is fine--and then there is Jared and I who want a baby so bad to have it taken away. I recieved a wonderful blessing from our neighbor tonight after we got home of comfort. I know that my Father in Heaven is so aware of how I feel, that this is such a struggle for me because it is something I want to happen so bad, I just need to take comfort in knowing that He knows my pain and eventually I will be able to have the family that I want.

Strange Dreams

I have been having some very odd dreams lately. One night I woke up and I was standing up looking at the T.V., last night was even more bizarre. I was totally asleep when I hear Jared yelling at me. It turns out I was kneeling over him, hitting him with my pillow. I woke him up from a dead sleep. He says I was yelling something about "the cat" - which we don't have a cat. I can remember doing something with my pillow but I thought I was sweeping it across the bottom of the bed, apparently not! After he woke me up, I talked to him for a minute and fell right back asleep. I didn't find out until he was getting ready for work that I was actually hitting him with my pillow. I have never had dreams where I actually do something, Jared says I do mumble sometimes but he never understands me. It was one crazy night, more so for him I guess! I just hope he continues to sleep in the same bed as me.